It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
We need to rekindle our bromance
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
