can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Randomize
