How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
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