is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
