Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
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