How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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