Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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