Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
