belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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