Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
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