I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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