Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
