i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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