I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
