We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize
