Kiss
Puke
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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