Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
