North Korea, Best Korea!
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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