I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
Randomize
