My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
