I have demons in me.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
