Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
