We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Randomize
