Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
