I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Randomize
