Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
He did a backflip because drugs
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize