Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
