GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
