"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
