the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
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