Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Randomize
