He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Randomize
