Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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