Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
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