Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Randomize
