Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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