She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
Randomize
