There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Randomize
