I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I blacked out at work again... Except this time my boss watched me throw up by the bus stop and some woman let me sleep on her shoulder for an hour. Why does this keep happening?
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
