doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
...so i touched it.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
