So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
