Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
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