Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Randomize
