We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Randomize
