I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
