Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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