You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize