just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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