something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
