Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
